Looking for Books to Help Navigate a Mean World.

I'm sure that I'm not the only one who has noticed in the last decade or so that much of society has become increasingly mean, disrespectful, rude, greedy, selfish and heartless toward their fellow humans--as well as toward animals. Now, I realize that not everyone is this way but at least in my area of the world, social politeness has degraded severely in my lifetime.

As many of you know, I have a debilitating psychiatric condition called, schizoaffective disorder, which is basically bipolar with some schizophrenic symptoms. Along with having a.d.d., it's hard for me to filter out the toughness and harsh social relations that are poisoning our society. Since I have trouble screening the constant bombardment of stimuli in this world, I have little bandwidth, so to speak, to absorb this nasty behavior.

Thus, I get sad, angry and frustrated with the world, rather easily. Whether it's navigating reckless driving, dealing with selfish people at the market, or living amongst others who live a shallow, superficial life; it's hard to learn how to live amongst such heartlessness and ignorance without it depressing you to the point of wanting to give up!!

So, I am looking for some suggestions on some books that I could read about how to deal with mean, nasty, rude, selfish people. I'm not talking about any of the traditional Buddhist texts/books but rather those specifically dealing with how to live in this world without it getting to you, and turning you into a cynical person from a purely psychological, clinical point of view. To narrow it down further, I'm looking for a "self-help" type book on tips for dealing with such cruelty. Of course, meditation helps a lot, (as do Buddhist books) but I need something that's more related to specific tips on living in the modern world of cruelty from a non-religious point of view.

Please, don't criticize me or condemn me for my struggles. I'm a very tender person and gets easily depressed, down on myself and easily over-whelmed with negativity. If you don't know of something that can help, and would rather tell me my problem is not being a "good enough Buddhist," then please have some compassion and keep your thoughts to yourself.

I know this is the anonymous dominated cyber-land, but please treat me with respect and remember that behind my profile is a real person who struggles a lot with psychological issues. I'm a strong person but also quite fragile to stress. This is a very hard issue for me to deal with and talk about. I don't need criticism--I need support, understanding and some tips on a few books that might help me deal with my psychological stresses from having to live with this world. Thank-you for understanding my sensitivity. It's hard enough writing this out and exposing myself, so please, treat me how you'd want to be treated. Thanks, again--James.

~Peace to all beings~

Depression: A Reality of Samsara.

The last few days have been hard ones. I have chronic depression as some of you know from the bipolar end of my Schizoaffective disorder. When we are depressed and feeling defeated; it's all we can think about. In a sense, it's a denial that things are impermanent, and thus a denial that things will get better at some point. Thus, the depression becomes a downward spiral of self-fulling prophecy.

We aren't bad or to blame for this denial because we wouldn't do it if we honestly didn't believe the delusions the mind is projecting. This is especially true for those who experience biological, chemically induced depression. If the brain is missing a certain volume of chemical then it's bound to run low on batteries at some point. If your car breaks down despite doing your best to keep up with the maintenance; do you blame yourself for it? Of course not, you know that cars break down from time to time--it's the nature of life. Things break down, and at some point no longer work.

So, why can't we feel that way about depression? Well, I think because the habit-mind clings so tightly to this idea that it is permanent and special. So, when something comes along like depression that upsets that sense of comfort, and makes it feel endangered it wallows in misery that it isn't being "pleased." It doesn't feel special anymore and like a two-year old, it's pouting. It wants someone to blame for it's misfortune, and, so it turns on the personality-mind within itself that represents you to the world. The personality-mind is the outward expression of who you are--the collective karma that emanates as "you." It's a projection of our mind like a hologram that is quite sophisticated, and often is mistaken as a separate entity. However, I digress.

The mind gets stuck in a loop of blame because it can't accept the reality that things change. So, if you're going to be thinking anyway; why not contemplate on the depression itself rather than on the effects of the depression. This means first accepting that depression is simply a fact of human existence. It will never be different for the human form because it is at its core, flawed. This isn't our fault but rather just how things evolved. When we accept this truth then we can ease up on ourselves. So, when seen in that light, depression emerges from the behind the dark, menacing clouds of self-hatred and into the illuminating sunshine of awareness that such is the condition of being human.

This is contemplating on depression itself, as a concept that touches everyone. So, this helps me become better aware that we're not being singled out; as depression can often convince us into believing. It helps us step-back from it and see that the depression is a temporary storm but certainly not something that can't be survived. However, when we contemplate upon the of the effects of the depression, and, thus personalize it by thinking we're worthless and useless then we will never feel happy. In addition, the depression will go deeper and last longer--It's assured.

We need to embrace our depression to understand it because withing understanding it we won't be aware of where to make adjustments. It's easy to want to push it away and try to ignore it but that just makes the problems bigger. When a child is sad, do you turn them away or ignore them? Or course not--you cradle them, hold them and ask them to tell you all about it. The same is true of ourselves. We must be compassionate toward ourselves or else how can we be compassionate toward others? Seeing how all is interconnected you can't really have one without the other.

Contemplating upon depression as a symptom of life helps us dislodge that corrosive emotion that tells us we're not good enough. How can we ever be, "good enough" if we think that we suck and everyone else is perfect? Does that make sense? Of course not. So, when we contemplate upon depression itself we realize that rather than being the only person in the world who can't figure life out, we're just like everyone else!! And, just knowing that you're not alone, and that you're experiencing a natural, normal and very common emotion of the human condition helps you survive the dark hours of depression.

However, it's not always that easy to just flip the switch, and some days we just have to lick our wounds and do our best to be kind to ourselves until the storm passes. I know how hard it is to struggle with depression but it's ten times harder when you think you deserve to feel depressed. Or, that you deserve to live a life of unhappiness. We are all destined for liberation regardless of what obstacle is the biggest in on our path. Please, if you are struggling with depression and mental illness know that there are people out there who care and want to help. As for me, my light is always on and my door always open at: jaymur@gmail.com

~Peace to all beings~

Discouraged.

***WARNING: LONG Rant ahead that's not your typical "Kittens and flowers" Buddhist post***

I'm struggling lately in my Dharma practice. I haven't meditated in months--not because I don't want to because I do, but I just can't get myself to do it. A large part of it is my mental illness that makes finding motivation extra challenging. Especially when the heavy medicating drugs I have to take to prevent mania and psychotic episodes zap me further of the will to do much of anything. It's difficult to fully convey how difficult it is to over-come.

Furthermore, I deal with a constant level of depression just beneath the surface of even my best days where I feel fairly decent. And please don't say, "Everyone gets depressed" because deep, clinical depression isn't like just having a bad day. Irregardless of that it's just an insensitive thing to say to someone who is living with clinical depression. It's chronic and biologically based on chemical imbalances in the brain.

And it's not as easy as just taking a pill because I already do, and still there is this underlying level of feeling like life isn't worth it. People think just because there are medications that they are cures--they help take the corners off the sharpest symptoms but they don't "cure" you in the sense that they don't bring you to the level of those who don't live with a severe mental illness.

Ironically, I was attracted in part to Buddhism because of it's psychological benefits, and I still believe it has immense help for those dealing with mental illness. However, Buddhism is difficult for anyone let alone for people with mental health challenges (unless you're enlightened, and how many can honestly claim that?). And it seems that the more I think I know about Buddhism the less I actually do. Everyone loves that "honeymoon phase" when you first taste the Dharma and it literally changes the way you see the world for the better but then the nitty-gritty, hard work begins and at times you stop and ask yourself, "Is this really worth it?"

It is. Buddhism can be a real bitch, and sometimes I wish I could just adhere to a religion where blind faith was about all I needed to do. However, I have felt those fleeting moments of enlightenment too profoundly to abandon the Dharma. I'm just discouraged about how poor my practice is right now, and has been for some time. An aspect of this discouragement stems from a lot of anger that I struggle with on a daily basis, which is, in part, again, rooted in the schizoaffective disorder.

I have Attention Deficit Disorder (or, A.D.D.) in conjunction with the affective side of things (affective simply means mood disorder, or bipolar. So, schizoaffective disorder is a combination of some schizophrenic symptoms and some bipolar symptoms). A.D.D. is a condition, which (in part) prevents the brain from being able to screen out stimuli that most people can relegate to the background.

So, while I am also hearing and listening to you talking to me, I can also hear at the same time: birds chirping outside, the kids screaming in their yard as they play, the traffic noise, the humming of the refrigerator and other appliances, the lawn mower going in the distance, etc. and I can't screen it out to focus simply on the conversation. All of this noise at once raises the stress in my mind and makes me impatient with the inability to focus on just one sound, which often makes me angry. In addition, I am hyper-aware of what is going on in the world and I get so angry because I just see humanity (and especially here in America) doing everything it can to destroy itself, its environment, its economy, its political system of democracy, its compassion for those who need assistance, its decency toward others in public places, its health care system, its acceptance of minorities and those of different sexual orientation, and on and on.

It makes me wonder what's the point of doing anything?!! Why participate in society and voting when it doesn't seem to make a difference or matter. What is the difference between letting karma do it's thing and predestination because some Buddhists seem to just shrug their shoulders in the face of struggles as if to say, "Eh, it's just karma doing its thing--what's the point?" And, yes, I know that suffering is inevitable and everywhere. I know that the world is not the place to look for stability. However, it seems that in response, many Buddhists take the default position to disconnect from society and disregard politics.

Yet, I struggle with this solution because it seems rather fatalistic, nihilistic and a form of avoidance. It seems to me that we owe it to ourselves to try and do our best to make it a better world--even if it can never be perfect. Aren't we making things worse if we just disconnect from society? Don't we have a duty to try our best to help build a better society? What if everyone just disregarded politics and civic responsibilities? Isn't it a bit selfish in a way? If no one tried to maintain some sort level of a stable world then it seems to me that some dictator would just take advantage of that and wipe out whole sections of the globe. Isn't that basically just letting suffering multiply? It's one thing to realize that suffering on some level is inevitable. However, to just disconnect seems to ironically cause more suffering from less and less good-hearted people participating to crafting how a country's general society behaves.

I'm certainly not giving up on Buddhism by any stretch but I'm discouraged today and it has been building. I guess my discouragement is with a lot of things but my Buddhist practice has me a bit frustrated, dispirited and depressed. I know it's not Buddhism that is the problem, and I know that I have a lot of work to do but please don't just post simplistic comments saying things like, "All you have to do is 'A' or 'B.'" Or, "You're problem is 'X.'"Everyone is full of advise but it's all easier said than done.

I'm not necessarily looking for answers, or advice--just some sympathy and assurance that I'm not the only one with these discouragements. I mean, intuitively I know that I'm not the only one but the things I hear sometimes from my fellow Buddhists makes me feel like I missed out on some meeting where everyone gained enlightenment. I'm not any kind of expert and I've got plenty of rust around the edges but I am always skeptical of people who seem to think they have it all figured out and that they're going to set everyone straight on how to be like them.

Mental Illness: Meditation or Medication? Often, Both.

This is a long post but an important one because it touches on an issue--mental illnes, which some in spiritual circles choose to ignore. As many of you know I have been living with schizoaffective disorder for most of my life and have found great refuge, relief of symptoms and calm from Buddhism and meditation in particular. Of course, we all are "mentally ill" or else we wouldn't be here in samsara but some have severe, biological mental illnesses and require a hybrid approach of therapies and practices.

I notice that the more I meditate the easier it is to deal with my condition. Yet meditation alone isn't enough in my situation because despite meditating I still am debilitated by disabling symptoms such as paranoia, hallucinations, delusions (psychiatric delusions such as being convinced that you are the most horrible person on Earth), mood swings and chronic depression.

Thus I have found medications help fill the void and basically keep me alive because my depressive episodes easily lead to suicidal thoughts. I have found an excellent psychiatrist who has found a great balance of medications to keep myself as stable as can be expected outside finding a cure to the disease. In addition I talk regularly with a psychotherapist to help me keep track of my mood swings and give me tips on how to better manage my illness through establishing routines and developing other techniques. So I was excited when I read an excellent article in the current Buddhadharma magazine that arrived in my mailbox today about this very subject:

When Buddhism first came to the West, many teachers and practitioners initially dismissed psychotherapy as superficial, unnecessary and possibly counterproductive. As time went on...psychotherapy's relationship to spiritual practice started to undergo a reevaluation, and the two disciplines began to intermingle a bit more. In fact, many therapists and meditation teachers now agree that meditation and psychotherapy can be mutually facilitating. Meditators seem to progress more quickly in theraphy, while psychotherapy can improve the effectiveness of their meditation.

James: I am one of those meditators who have progressed more quickly in therapy thanks in part to my meditation practice. In fact, when I come into therapy and am having a difficult time with my mental illness she always asks if I'm meditating and the answer is often, "no." So in a lot of ways my meditation practice is a type of medication though I still do have episodes despite meditating. When I meditate on a regular basis it takes some of the severity out of my symptoms. That said, while meditation is very effective it isn't the entire solution and I think we Buddhists must admit that meditation isn't the solution to everthing--especially when medical issues are involved. It is true that meditation has been shown to reduce blood pressure, induce relaxation and other health benefits but it can not solve severe, biological mental illness symptoms in total.

Combining meditation and psychotherapy makes sense if we appreciate how they work in complementary ways. For the most part, meditation focuses primarily on developing capacities such as concentration and awareness, whereas psyschotherpay focuses primarily on changing the objects of awareness, such as emotions and beliefs. Of course there are significant overlaps, but this complimentarity suggests why combining both approaches can be very helpful. Meditative qualities can facilitate psychotherapeutic healing of painful patterns, while the psychotherapeutic healing of these painful patterns can reduce the disruption of spiritual practice.

James: Medication has toned down the volume of distracting stimuli in my head such as the hallucinations and calmed my nerves to enable me the opportunity to actually be able to practice. Before medications I wouldn't have had the patience to meditate due to manic episodes that kept my thoughts racing too fast to have the concentration needed to sit even for a few minutes. It's like trying to do meditation effectively after drinking four pots of coffee in an hour. Either that or I'd be so depressed that I couldn't get out of bed let alone have the motivation and intention to meditate.

So the medication has lowered the volume and reduced the static in my brain to put me in a position where meditation is actually even an option and be able to not just do it but find great benefit from it. I was drowning without medication and the water was up to my mouth and nose so the medications have drained the water down to my chest level. So while it's difficult to walk through chest deep water at least I can now (for the most part) breath comfortably, which gives me the freedom to meditate and have the ability to make progress upon the path that otherwise would be basically impossible. When it comes to using medication in combination with a Buddhist practice there are basically too camps according to the author of this article. First, the purists and second the pragmatists (I fall into pragmatist category):

Spiritual purists argue that if mental suffering is fundamentally spiritual and karmic, spiritual practice alone is appropriate to treat it. Moreover they are concerned that medication may dull or derail spiritual practice. They also worry that medications may reduce or distort awareness, and thereby make practice more difficult. In this view, medications can be novel forms of the "mind clouding intoxicants" prohibited by the lay precepts to which many Buddhists practitioners adhere. Therefore, taking these modern pharmacological agents is tantamount to violating this precept.

James: Let me say that I have found personally (and I've read that this is the case for many others) that my medications do the opposite of "dull or derail spiritual practice," "reduce or distort awarness." Without them I was so depressed, mislead by hallucinations (voices) and detached by dissociation that I was a nihilist believing in nothing and wanting the world to explode to end everyone's misery. At least that's what I thought at the time in my deluded mind.

It wasn't until I started to lower the static in my head through medications that I saw the benefits of spirituality and sought out Buddhism. Before then my mind was clogged and preoccupied with constant mental torment and anguish. It simply didn't have the stability at the time for a spiritual practice. Thus is was before medications that I had a dulled spiritual practice--not after. The medications increased my awareness of reality rather than dull it as they helped sharpen my concentration, focus and attention (I have Attention Deficit Disorder as well) to enable me to actually have a chance at understanding concepts like mindfulness. I know for certain that I'd be spiritual lost still without the addition of medication to give me a somewhat stable mind to build a spiritual foundation upon.

By contrast, pragmatists hold that spiritual practice alone is simply insufficient, or at least not optimal, for healing all mental suffering. While not denying the validity of some purist concerns, pragmatists argue that certain problems and pathologies respond best to other therapies, and one of those therapies can be medication.

James: Buddhism can indeed be more than enough for the regular depression and anxiety that occur with living in samsara. However, those diagnosed with a severe biological mental illness that involves chemical imbalances within the brain need the additional help that comes with proper medication and therapeutic monitoring. It can be very dangerous and irresponsible to prevent someone with severe deperssion from seeking psychiatric help because suicide is a very real threat and should never, EVER be ignored or blown off.

People with a severe mental illness who do not seek medication are usually playing with a loaded gun that could very easily go off in the form of suicide. Some people can get by with herbal supplements and vitamins but most people with severe mental troubles need stronger medicine. I tried the "natural route" and it didn't even cut the symptoms much at all.

The author who is a professor of psychiatry (and a Buddhist) did a study with Buddhist practitioners with suffer from mental illness: Our team of researchers, all physicians and long-term meditators, investigated a group of nineteen Buddhist practioneers (thirteen women and six men) diagnosed with major depression. These practioneers had all been doing meditation, mainly vipassana, for at least three years, had participated in two or more weeklong retreats, and had used antidepressants in the last two years.

Most of our subjects reported that antidepressants helped them with multiple emotional, motivational, and cognitive functions. Emotional changes were consistent with an antidepressant effect. The painful emotions of anger and sadness decreased significantly, but fear showed a smaller response. The positive emotions of happiness, joy, love, and compassion all increased, as did self-esteem. Subjects also felt calmer and that their awareness was clearer. One would expect this kind of result, given that the subjects were no longer wrestling with intense, painful emotions.

Clearly the large majority of these meditators felt that they, and their spiritual practitice, benefited significantly from taking antidepressants. Several subjects reported that the antidepressants enabled them to recommence or significantly improve their meditation and spiritual practice.

James: So while there still is no cure for schizoaffective disorder and while I still suffer from hallucinations, paranoia, bipolar, etc., the medications have given me my life back to where I can pursue things like spritituality. It has allowed me sharpen my awareness of reality and this life whereas before I was living in a kind of fog and everything was out of focus. So I can attest to the benefits of psychotherapy and medications. Thus, when added with meditation and other Buddhist practices it forms a powerful combination that has helped me greatly.

It's time that we realize that interdepenence includes science helping spirituality and spirituality helping science. The two working together can accomplish great things and don't necessarily have to be at odds. Sure there are some tensions between the two groups but there are areas where they fit perfectly and accent each other to benefit a great many people.

~Peace to all beings~

Nothing Lasts Forever.

Body impermanent like spring mist;

mind insubstantial like empty sky;

thoughts unestablished like breezes in space.

Think about these three points over and over.

-Adept Godrakpa, "Hermit of Go Cliffs"

James: I've been meditating over these verses for awhile now and the essence that I feel from these lines is one of liberation from the chains that keep me anchored in the deep bedrock of the ego-self. Reminding myself of the impermanance of the body emphasizes that the disease schizoffective disorder, which clouds my brain at times is merely a guest in the present moment of this birth/life.

A spring mist can dangerouslly cloud ones path and confuse a hiker climbing a mountain, which could cause him/her to fall off a cliff. However, if the hiker patiently sits still and is mindful of his/her surroudings then soon pockets of sky will appear again and the route becomes clearer. It's the same when dealing with a mental disorder.

Because forcing my way through cloudy "misty" states of mind that come with schizoaffective disorder makes things worse and leads to decisions that are inherent with danger. Living with a mental disorder gives a person plenty of chances to accept that the mind isn't the ally that we often believe it to be. The power of the mind to control my life is stripped in accepting that the thoughts the mind produces are usually nothing more than projections on a movie screen.

The mind can only be trusted to protect itself.

PHOTO CREDIT: Water Rock Knob, near the North Carolina/Tennessee border of the Blue Ridge Parkway. By Mr.icon on Flickr.

~Peace to all beings~

The Science of Meditation.

Emory, Georgia (USA) -- For thousands of years, Buddhist meditators have claimed that the simple act of sitting down and following their breath while letting go of intrusive thoughts can free one from the entanglements of neurotic suffering. Now, scientists are using cutting-edge scanning technology to watch the meditating mind at work. They are finding that regular meditation has a measurable effect on a variety of brain structures related to attention — an example of what is known as neuroplasticity, where the brain physically changes in response to an intentional exercise. The same researchers reported last year that longtime meditators don't lose gray matter in their brains with age the way most people do, suggesting that meditation may have a neuro-protective effect.

A rash of other studies in recent years meanwhile have found, for example, that practitioners of insight meditation have noticeably thicker tissue in the prefrontal cortex (the region responsible for attention and control), and that experienced Tibetan monks practicing compassion meditation generate unusually strong and coherent gamma waves in their brains.

James: I think this is partly why so many Buddhist monks live so long. Thich Nhat Hanh for example is in his 80's but could easily pass for 60. He'll be 82 on the 11th of this month. I wrote a few posts back on how meditation and mantra meditation have helped me cope with my schizoaffective disorder. I spoke in that post solely on depersonalization but I wanted to do this post because of the results of the study that show improved attention and control.

Well It got my attention because I am very interested in the relation between science and Buddhism as many of you know and because I have as apart of my mental condition attention deficit disorder (A.D.D.) When a person has A.D.D. it means that they can't "screen out" or filter background "noise" and commotion like most people are able to do. So while it appears as though we are just not "listening" sometimes to someone talking to us or that we can't concentrate upon something it's because we are having to deal with many things at once, which makes it very difficult to focus on one thing. I kind of liken it to having to read a science or math text book to prepare for an exam while the t.v. is loudly playing, while someone is trying to talk to you and while your alarm clock is beeping. Is it any wonder then that we don't retain conversation details as well as folks who don't have A.D.D.?

However, when I meditate I find it much easier to deal with external stimuli. I think part of it is being able to close my eyes to eliminate all the visual distractions that often distract me as I'm very sensitive to colors and images. So with my eyes shut it's somewhat similar to putting a towel over a bird that escaped its cage. It panics and acts frantic flying around bumping into things and not knowing where it is but once you can throw a towel around them and cut off their vision they relax and calm down to where you can help them.

So with my eyes shut I am better able to concentrate upon my breathing and deal with the sounds from the daily routine and traffic of a busy neighborhood. Instead of trying to shut them out I let them pass through my ears and register in my mind. I focus on each sound and hold it in my mind as I breath in and then I let it fade away as I breath out. In this way I am able to deal with each sound mostly one at a time. Not unlike serving people one at a time in a line rather than all at once.

I contemplate the sound and recognize it so that my subconscious knows that I’m paying attention to it and I contemplate on what each sound means and then symbolically I kindly escorting the noise out of my mind with the exhale and I repeat the process as needed. I also find it helpful to thank my sub consciousness for keeping me informed but remind it that it doesn’t have to work so hard and that it can take a break. It seems to work. It seems like it backs off on pushing the noise over and over and louder and louder, which is exactly what I find happens when I try to ignore it.

Then I’ve noticed that once I emerge from meditation that my mind is sharper, better able to concentrate without interference and better able to hold my attention a good period of time later. After meditation it also helps me feel more patient and less overwhelmed with stimuli because I am continuing that thought processing used while meditating. Of course it never lasts all day but the more I practice the longer I can go without too much interference and stress from all the stimuli. It is much like learning a language in a way, the more you practice the more your mind rewires itself. And so no wonder the great teachers all refer to meditation as practice. Of course I'd have a hard time even getting on the meditation seat without medication but it works well with meditation. So I can attest to you that indeed this scientific study is spot on.

~Peace to all beings~

Religion and Mental Health.

This has the potential to be a controversial post but if you've been reading me long then you know that I don't shy away from such posts. However, I don't mean to offend anyone with this post. Overall I'm just really curious about the subject. I'm not saying anything below is true or false because I don't know but I do find the subject fascinating.

I don't mean to belittle any particular religion. I'm just wondering about things. Probably thinking too much as I tend to do. So please forgive me in advance if I offend.

From time to time I contemplate the cross-roads between religion and mental health, two of my favorite subjects. As many of you know I live with a mental condition called Schizo-Affective disorder which is a combination of Bipolar type 1 and some symptoms of Schizophrenia. One of the things that is common amongst many mentally ill is a strong religious/spiritual connection yet often we are misunderstood (by some religions) as having "demons" possessing our minds.

This is a touchy subject but I've been wondering if some of the great spiritual leaders in history had mental health conditions/challenges. For example, was Jesus mentally ill? I don't mean to single him out but he is the one I'm most familiar with given I was raised Christian and spent 22 years as a Christian. I'm not saying that Jesus was indeed mentally ill but there are some intriguing connections. He saw visions, claimed to be able to talk with an invisible god and claimed to be the son of that god. In addition to believing that he had supernatural powers (we don't know if he did or did not have these gifts).

There was no understanding of mental illness in those days and therefore I can see why people would think that someone who claims to see visions and to be able talk to god would seem other-worldly, special and mystical since not all of the people showed those inclinations. And it makes sense that they would see those who were completely insane to be "possessed" for a lack of any other explanation for their behavior.

This all being said, even if Jesus and others had mental conditions doesn't mean that they were any less inspirational, amazing or transcendental. And having struggles with mental health doesn't preclude one from having a deep spiritual connection and as long as that spiritual connection is beneficial and not disruptive to one's sanity and safety then I think it's a gift. In fact some of the most spiritual people are those with mental health struggles because they are often more able to transcend the logical mind that holds us all hostage to some degree. Shamans for example are spiritual leaders of nature based religions who are initiated and receive special insights after surviving a personal psychological crisis.

As for the Buddha he seemed to be part psychologist as the religion that evolved from his teachings is one that is very beneficial to those suffering from mental conditions. It seems to be the religion that most addresses the mind and its formations. I guess that is why it is often called the "religion of psychology." However, the Buddha himself had some supernatural experiences that could be argued to have been hallucinations--who knows. Yet even if they were hallucinations it doesn't necessarily take away from their meaning and power.

This all being said, most religions have the potential to help those with mental struggles but there are some damaging teachings in certain religions that are still evident such as demonic possession. As well as teachings that people with mental illnesses have them because they are being punished for some perceived wrong doing. Or that it is a sign that they have a weak mind which is total ignorance because myself and many other mentally ill folks that I know have contemplated deep issues that many living on the surface haven't even considered let alone come to terms with such as death.

Anyway, just something I've been thinking about.

~Peace to all beings~

Resentment Against Suffering

The suffering itself is not so bad, it's the resentment against suffering that is the real pain.

-Alan Ginsberg

James: Today I'm dealing with the resentment against suffering. Sorry it's been awhile since I last posted. It's been a rough week with my illness. Any words of comfort and support would be greatly appreciated.

~Peace to all beings~