Barely Political: Ke$ha and Twitter Parody

I found a couple awesome parodies from Barely Political (the satire group on Youtube that used to have Obama girl) that I needed to post on the blog. The first one is about Ke$ha's intervention:




The second video is about the worthlessness of Twitter as a social media outlet:




I think that the Kesha parody is better than the actual song. The Twitter parody is also pretty good.


Here is my obligatory cute girl to keep my viewers interested (and to provide a cool thumbnail).

Campus Cute Girl

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Funny Tweets from Twitter

Why won't people just publish the truth on Twitter? It's so much funnier! Here are some awesome tweets from that hated enemy, Twitter.

  

"I Tweeted a girl and she liked it! I Tweeted your mom too -- twice."

"Why did Evan Williams cross the road? A: So that he could waste the world's time shouting boring, personal information to the passing cars."

"You love Kate Gosselin or you have "made love" to her? A lot of people can say the latter, not many the former."
 
You're gonna need "plus 8" to date Kate Gosselin. Her vagina has passed more kids than a playground slide. 

Kate Gosselin -- so much of a horse face that you want to giver her a carrot and lump of sugar.

Kate Gosselin: Be truthful, who knows the names of all eight of her kids? Hint: sleepy, dopey, and bashful aren't correct answers.

Time to wake up and tell people about your empty life via Twitter.

Kate Gosselin -- evidence that every trailer park girl can grow up and have her own T.V. show!

Kate Gosselin -- maybe if I tweet empty suck up comments about her, I'll get them retweeted up too!

Kate Gosselin -- when a white girl has 8 kids, they make a T.V. show. When a Mexican girl does, they complain about the welfare system.

Kate Gosselin & DJ Keemstar dating? I'm dating the fat girl down the street? Why do people care about one and not the other?

KateGossilin I never watched your show, think you have too many kids, and can't believe the kind of jerk you used to sleep with.

Kate Gosselin: who cares, who cares, who cares, . . . infinity + 1.

  

If you follow people b/c they have a picture of a cute girl in their profile #thatsaproblem b/c it's actually a 45 year old dude.

If you use Twitter for reasons other than boredom or to spam out links #thatsaproblem b/c it means that you have no life!

  

#thistweetisdedicated2 #thatsaproblem The internet: the only place where you get Loled for making fun of Jesus but banned for Evan Williams

#thistweetisdedicated2 #thatsaproblem Is Evan Williams gay? The world may never know!

  

If you use Twitter as a dating service #thatsaproblem because it's evenly divided between spambots, pornbots, and 12 month inactive tweeters

  

If you follow celebrities on Twitter #ThatsAProblem b/c they don't follow you, don't care about you, and have staffers write their Tweets.

  

If you spend more than 1 hour per year on Twitter #thatsaproblem because it show your lack of social skills and social life.

Twitter: the retarded, ugly, slutty, gay-loving, product-of-an-incestuous-relationship, step-sister of Facebook.

When is the last time you had someone click on a link you tweeted? That's how much they care!

Take two parts pornographer, one part spammer, 30 million lonely people, and programmers with too much time and what do you get? A: Twitter

Evan Williams: Nobody ever thought the world could produce something more irrelevant than a chat room. You proved them wrong!

Twitter == Friendster in 5 years time. Never heard of Friendster? Exactly my point!

  

Even if you're cool on Twitter, you're still lame in real life.

Twitter auto-follow software and anti-spam software: sold from the same business based in Canton, Ohio! Thanks, Twitter!

That hot picture? A: Your Mom 20 years ago. The person behind it? A: Your Dad trolling for 15 year old boys. Ain't Twitter great?

  

I spit on the grave of the grandmother of the creators of Twitter!

Block my account, eh Twitter? Well, flock you!

Twitter is for h0rny guys and marketers with profiles with a pic of a cute girl looking to spam them.

twitter is for jerks with no life who want people to care about what they do.

  

I hate Twitter more than I hate green bean casserole, and I hate green bean casserole.

Twitter management == Na$i stooges.

I hate the people managing Twitter. I believe that they're closet Republicans.                             

 Hot Twitter Girl:

 

Mel Gibson Secret Rant about Pizza Delivery Boy

Image via Wikipedia

In a return to classic article style, Future Twit has peered into the secret Twitter files of Mel Gibson and found that not just Jews and his girlfriend, Oksana Grigorieva, are the victims of his rage and bigotry anymore. Read as he uses Twitter to attack a defenseless pizza delivery boy.

FatNazi: I'm going to try out Twitter to order some pizza. I'll let my two remaining fans know how it goes.

PapaJohns: Can I help you?

FatNazi: I'd like to three extra larges with all the meat and 50 buffalo wings.

PapaJohns: Do you need extra plates delivered with that?

FatNazi: No, it's just for me . . . I mean, sure, lots of plates. They're free, right?

PapaJohns:It's an extra 25 cents.

FatNazi: Uh, just the pizza then. My ex-girlfriend and wife are cleaning me out right now. You haven't heard about that, have you?

PapaJohns: Nope. I've been living on Mars for the past three years. How will you be paying tonight, sir?

FatNazi: I won't. I'm Mel Gibson.

PapaJohns: You will. I'm the night manager, and I tell Ricardo what pizzas to make.

FatNazi: You won't let me have the pizza for free? You little #&!$. I #&!$ing own you.

PapaJohns: Sir, we're not going to deliver three pizzas for free to Malibu at 2 am without a credit card number.

FatNazi: I #&!$ing own Malibu!

PapaJohns: Sir, Papa Johns is a place of business. You can't just prank Tweet to us.

FatNazi: I #&!$ing own Papa John -- kind of a gay fetish bet thing.

PapaJohns: TMI. So, no veggies right?

FatNazi: Veggies? You read like a slut! I said ONLY MEAT!

PapaJohns: Calm down sir, my mistake. No veggies it is.

FatNazi: Well, I can't help it if you're going to get raped by a pack of pizza delivery boys because you read like a slut!

PapaJohns: Right . . . so, it will be 62.50, due at the door on delivery. Thanks for your business.

FatNazi: Tell the driver I might be naked when I answer the door.

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My Analysis of Twitter

Oh, the wonderful unity that Twitter has brought to the world! Instead of sitting on the John and reading a magazine as the primitive man would, we can now sit on the John and twitter to the world, "Hey, everybody, I'm sitting on the John!"

In the future, I unfortunately see Twitter becoming a more and more integral part of our society. Why? Because you're all a bunch of nosy voyeurs, that's why! You are the problem! Can't you make it 30 minutes without an update about what your friend is eating for lunch, what show they are watching on T.V., or how bad the traffic is on the way home from work? Is your life really that empty?

If you still don't understand, perhaps these videos will help.

1. The Future of Twitter



2. Twitter Whores



3. A Night with Ann Coulter (not relevant, just funny)





4. Glen Beck (also pretty funny)





5. Miley Cyrus Twitter




One more (Bill Maher)





Well, you get the idea. If you don't, please die.