Positively Free Sex and the City Tour

The May 30th New York City premiere of Sex and the City: The Movie has inspired a fever pitch of hype and scramble for affiliation with all things Sarah Jessica Parker. New York City and local entrepreneurs are preparing to cash in.

Soon, a multitude of the fabulous and metrosexual will converge upon Manhattan, gobbling up SATC souvenirs, fighting for glimpses of stars on the red carpet, and spending outrageous sums of money for Sex and the City theme tours. While some tours are a perfectly reasonable way to enjoy the Big Apple, others are sold out, and still others are so obnoxiously expensive they should be banned for excessive opulence.

Truthfully, I'm a little appalled. Spending that much money for a friggn' city tour, are these people nuts? I like the SATC franchise just as much as anyone else, but you don't see me dropping huge wads of cash for something I can do on my own for nothing.

In fact, I'm so adverse to seeing so much money go down the drain, I decided to create an online tour of my own. No, it doesn't include injections of botox or boutique shopping jaunts, but it does give a fairly accurate picture of the SATC "hot spots." Even better, it's positively 100% FREE! I say, save your money for better things.

Like making a donation to my PayPal account.

Or buying your next gallon of gas.

Charlotte gets a free pair of shoes in exchange for a naughty massage.

Samantha impersonates a member of a pool club to cool off on a hot day. There's the pool roof off in the distance.

The ladies pay a visit to The Pleasure Chest where Charlotte purchases a little toy she names "Rabbit."

Remember the episode where Carrie and Samantha start ogling a priest? There's the church where the scenes were filmed. I hear the producers had to offer a hefty donation for the location.

I find it hard to believe the red door with graffiti filled walls is tour worthy, but here's the scene where Samantha exits her apartment building. Funny how the place barely resembles the red door from the series.

The official Sex and the City cosmopolitan is a staple of all the tours. These are being served in a pub, not the restaurant where this scene was shot.

It wouldn't be a "Sex and The City" tour unless you stopped at Magnolia Bakery for cupcakes. Here, the line snakes around the door about 80 people long. In a scene from the series, Carrie tells Miranda about her Aidan crush as they lick cupcakes on an outside bench.

Another popular tour destination is the steps outside Carrie Bradshaw's brownstone. Everyone stops to have pictures taken. The brownstone is actually located in the Village, not the Lower East Side as portrayed in the series.

"Your girl is beautiful, Hubbell," Carrie says to Big, a nod to "The Way We Were." The scene was filmed at the fountain across from The Plaza Hotel, a fitting way to end this tour on a high note.


Just in case you wanted to see some actual people on one of these tours, I'll leave you with the foreign film version. Au revoir, ladies.

Death of a Rumor: "Sex and The City" Movie Plot Revealed

The "buzz kicks into overdrive" as SATC: The Movie inches ever closer to its London debut. Squawks of foul play from New Yorkers (even those from Brooklyn) have become all too palpable as wounds from being poked with the raw end of a stick begin to crack the veneer of Manhattan sidewalks.

No wonder people are strewing death rumors about like Mardi Gras beads, ratcheting the electrified air of tension into a fever pitch of frenzy.

If I had known Big was gonna die, I would have commissioned a dirge for the premiere.

Put the rumors to rest, dear gossip mongers. A flurry of nitter natter signifying nothing can only buttress the headlines so long. Nobody dies in the most hotly anticipated movie of the summer, although someone did pitch the idea to director Michael Patrick King.

'I did want an emotional roller-coaster,' King said. 'But my ultimate target was to make our 'girlfriends' -- in other words, our audience -- happy. And I don't think Mr. Big dying would make them happy.'

You got that right, pal. If Carrie and Big don't march off happily ever after, somebody's "gonna haf a lahda 'splaining" to do.

Replacing the original satisfyingly delicious illusion of the series ending with a cinematic 180 would be the most boneheaded move in film history. But it wouldn't be the first time some Hollywood doodad messed around with perfection.

Just please let Charlotte have her baby. That woman needs another object for her affections. Umpteen kisses with Elizabeth Taylor are beginning to spoil her Madonna image, not to mention cause an overwhelming "yech" feeling in the pit of my stomach.

[Source]

First Trailer Tease for Sex and the City Movie

It's he -ere. The first trailer tease of the Sex and the City Movie!



Oh -kay, then, yah. This is the film I've been anxiously anticipating? The one that seemingly went on hiatus on account of diva battles and hissy fits? If SJP didn't plant a big wet one on Noth, there would be no incentive whatsoever to catch this sorry splice of Manhattan fashion. Sorry, people, you'll have to do better.

SATC fans want fashion excitement. That big fat white hibiscus? Over! I've already seen it on so many web sites, by the time it appears on the big screen, it'll signal little more than a good time to hit the bathroom.

What about romance? Sexual tension? Did the promo people think inconsequential snippets of dialogue would suffice?

Is the entire movie a dream? Is Carrie stuck in a delusional sweat inducing fever resulting mass hallucination? The background music seems more than mere coincidental innuendo. Oops. Am I giving away the plot?

I'll lay odds in Vegas this flick will not be released in the spring.

Clunker or blockbuster? Too early to decide? Give us a clue. The producers of this film certainly aren't.